IS it time to admit defeat?
For two days now I have been smoking. Yes, SMOKING!
Lurking in public places, I have been accosting complete strangers and asking them for a light. I don’t own a lighter anymore and feel to buy one would signal the true end of my quest to be a non-smoker.
I’ve got plenty of helpline numbers to ring, for support, but I’m an addict. Talking to someone isn’t going to achieve anything – except waste somebody’s time. If I’m going to do it, I’m going to do it.
You see, an addict doesn’t really need an excuse to exploit a weak moment. Bad news, good news and, in my case, no news, are all valid reasons to light up.
This time round, my lapse has been prompted by good news; of the kind that you could only ever dream of happening. It involves money and that’s all I’m going to say – except I haven’t won the lottery.
If this phase passes and I’m able to get back on track, I’ll let you know.
Yours, shamefully
Belinda Bennett
Lapsed non-smoker