Smoke Stop

The body snatcher

MY nicotine intake was substantially reduced during my recent holiday to Cornwall and North Devon. This was mainly due to lack of designated smoking areas in and around my hotel. Also, I was busy exploring and taking in the views.

Now I'm back to the grindstone, the number of cigarettes I light up is gradually increasing.

Spurring me on is a strange dream, one which I've had for three consecutive nights. It's scary...

I'm watching my funeral from the doorway of St Paul's Church. As my coffin is carried back to the hearse following the service, there is a strange noise and then the ghostly figure of a highwayman and his horse can be seen galloping down High Street from the direction of Monkton Road. As the horse approaches the hearse, it rears up and the highwayman, brandishing a pistol, says: "Give me the body!" He has bright yellow buttons on a green waistcoat, barely concealed beneath a long cape.

I can see Margaret Lewis, curator of Allhallows Museum, standing to one side with a hand over her mouth. The yellow buttons and his words give the highwayman away - it is the ghost of legendary Honiton highwayman William Jennings; he who dispensed with the cliche "Stand and deliver" and got straight to the point, saying "Give me your money".

I don't know what the dream means. I only know one thing - I want another cigarette!