IN a week that has seen me get married, become a victim of crime and be tossed about on umpteen funfair rides, could things get any WORSE?
Anybody watching the CCTV monitor outside the ghost train tunnel on Weston's Grand Pier last Sunday would have seen me screaming my head off, hands waving like an evangelist. I was 'letting it all out', anonymous, in the comfort of complete darkness. I was wailing for England - and the headless corpses and skeletons that jumped out of the blackness to scare me had nothing to do with it. Honest!
I was letting out my frustrations. It's a frustrating thing, you see, becoming a non-smoker. There are easy days and there are bad days. You'd think, after six weeks of abstinence, I'd be over the worst. Sadly, no!
The shocker is that every day is 'the worst', just lately. I'm an addict and, on bad days, don't I just know it!
Right now, at this very moment, I'd kill for a cigarette. Thank God it's just me, home alone, in my kitchen! (Where's this 'husband', when I need one?)
Luckily, I've got my inhalator. Re-charged, with a fresh cartridge, it's taking the hardest battering of my SmokeStop efforts, so far.
I'm on the second cartridge of the day - the most ever.
I've tried to keep myself occupied. I've published at least five exclusive stories on our website and I've been on a trip out into the country.
The thought of venturing from the rural to ultra-rural was good. Yeah, I was going to motor out into the countryside and stake my claim to the most remote of 'remote' outposts on my patch.
Great idea, bad timing... With Primal Scream keeping my Nicotine Dream alive, the vibes of Country Girl continuing to invade my airwaves, I was still in the grip of the surreal when I finally arrived in the village.
Left. Right. U-turn. Three point turn. Left. Right. Left again...
Oh dear! Why are developers allowed to build massive estates in villages?
It was a scarier ride than the ghost train. Especially when I reached a dead end and was faced with a massive gargoyle, plonked smack-bang in the centre of somebody's front garden! If I was in the grounds of a stately home I might expect such a sight, not on Starter Home Way!
I've survived the day without smoking. It's been hard but, at least, there was some good news...
The Midweek Herald has been short listed for a major industry prize.
Puff on that, rivals!